05 April 2010

Under Pressure

"Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."
~ John14:27 

The last week or so has been very challenging.  A week ago Saturday, I worked, leaving me with no weekend.  This time of year is extremely hectic and it is very possible to become overwhelmed.  On top of that, I had an atc swap that was overdue so I was up way too late Tuesday and Wednesday as I scrambled to create "quality" pieces for the artists as promised.

Thursday, (April Fool's day) as I was sitting in an extremely boring meeting, a sudden feeling swept over me - a feeling that something definitely wasn't ok.  My left hand went numb, and then my left arm and my palms were wet with persperation. I thought to myself, "am I having a heart attack or a stroke?"  I had a co-worker walk me to the nurse's office, where I discovered my blood pressure had climbed extremely high.  Long story short - 911 was called and when they paramedics arrived my blood pressure had risen another 40 points!  Off to the hospital I went, ambulence sirens wailing and all!

As I lay there in the ambulence - by now I was feeling a tightening in my chest - the thought occurred to me that I could see the Lord face to face - even this very day.  A strange thing happened.  I had such a peace come over me.  I was ready - if it were His will.  I'd always thought that when faced with death, I would have a laundry list of things I'd regret never doing - travelling - watching my grandson grow up- seeing my new grandchild etc etc.  But no, at the end of the day (literally!) those things didn't concern me.  I was ready to leave this earth to spend eternity with Jesus. And I knew He would take good care of my children in my absence, even through their mourning.

Well, I was kept overnight for observation and a barage of tests.   I went home the next day with a "clean bill of health" and a renewed motivation to begin living a healthier lifestyle Praise God!!!

I returned home on Good Friday to meditate on my Savior who cares for me and died for my sins and defeated death 3 days later by arising in victory!!!

Happy Easter!


Clark Mills Family said...

My goodness, So relieved you are doing better. So HAPPY that you recieved the PEACE and ASSURANCE that no matter what it would be OK. The knowlege that God is by your side is incredible. Another assurance that God does not leave us alone. NOW that you know you are ok, keep telling yourself. We all live with some form of anxiety. I can tell you that I have been in the hospital twice now. Code blue... and Test after test it came out ok. The first time I was 36 the second time I was 41 Scary stuff. But it is definetly a time of putting your mind in a better place so that you don't allow your self to WORRY so much. Life hasn't stopped because you couldn't meet a deadline. All that is asked of us is to do the very best we can. IT WILL BE OK! I am comforted to know that because of our short friendship I will find you in heaven. I hope to meet you before then. You are one SPECIAL DAUGHTER of our HEAVENLY FATHER WHO LOVES YOU, and YOU LOVE HIM! Because of the Gospel we can have peace. I feel blessed to know you. XO